Sunday, July 19, 2009

The Weirdest Names I've Ever Heard

If you live in the suburbs you've come across your usual names: Chani, Moshe, Jim, Bob, Frank etc. You may have even come across some Shprintze, Penelope, Oswald type names. But nothing compares to the names you come across in the city. Some of them make you wonder why there aren't child cruelty rules preventing this from happening. Here are my favorites.

Twins named King and Queen, I am actually willing to forgive this one. It's a terrible thing to do to kids but sometimes it's hard to resist the urge to be cute when naming kids.

Twins named Lemonjello and Orangejello on the other hand makes it pretty tough not to laugh. You can tell what mom was craving when she was carrying these two. Official pronunciation is luh-man-juhlo and Oran-juhlo.

Female pronounced fuh-may-luh. Did the parents forget to fill this line in on the birth certificate? Did they think the baby ID bracelet saying "female Smith" was the hospitals way of suggesting a name?

ABCDE: pronounced Absida but to me seems more like the first five letters of the alphabet. I suppose they couldn't come up with anything more original.

Chlamydia, pronounced Klem-eh-die-uh. Perhaps they wanted to ensure their little girl never gets a boyfriend. ever.

And my personal favorite:
La-a Don't call her laah or leah. You'll get a sharp reproof: "It's pronounced luh - dash -uh. You pronounce the dash you idiot.". I'm wondering if maybe she had her named changed to this herself just so she could call people idiots and ensure that no one ever pronounces her name correctly.

Have you encountered any great names?

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